Key Lime's Great Revenge

Just realized that I'm the only one that has been eating the yummy Key Lime Pie in the fridge. Obviously I did not poll the whole family when I made such a pie selection.

However, last week I ordered some new size medium scrub pants for work, the larges I currently wear have been randomly falling down and I have been having to explain myself far too many times at the hospital. I thought these mediums were going to be a sure fire fit.

They weren't.

The pants laughed at me as I put them on. They actually laughed. It was hard to tell though because they were too tight, so it really sounded like someone being gagged with a bandanna like you see in the movies. But I know they were laughing.

Damn those pants.

I really don't understand. The ones I have now are too big, I ordered a smaller size. That should have solved my problem right? I did everything right.

Log onto website.
Select color.
Select size.
Select "You are too short to ride this ride" length.
Check the big booty button.

Dagnabbit!! That was it, I forgot to check the big booty button.

I'm not returning the pants, it's too damn complicated for me! I'm sure I've already lost the return slip anyways. And they make you pay for shipping it back!

I decided the only solution was to say a sad goodbye to Mr. KeyLime and put him in the trash. It was so sad. I had to console him the whole time. We shared a big hug, and a small smooch (Okay, okay, I ate a slice! Sue me!).

He's gone now. I've yet to try the pants on again. I'm waiting for them to stop laughing.